The Seasons

We were talking about the seasons. Specifically how she wants it to be summer now. I said I would be happy with spring. She wanted to know why, so I told her how spring is all about nice days, not too hot and not too cold, how the leaves and grass start growing in spring, and in general how spring is lovely, to me.

She was quiet for a moment, then asked, "It's like a warm breezy day, Gramma?"

Honestly, I have no clue where she pulls these phrases from.

Foodie

I made mini bagels with grilled cheese for her lunch.

"Grandma!!!! OH MY GOODNESS!!! These are awesome. We should always have these!"

"I am making sausage and perogies for supper."

"Those are my favourite!! Oh yay!!"

What?

Picked the kid up from daycare. She was babbling in the back seat, and I was not listening properly. All of a sudden I hear her say, "You should have said that, right Grandma?"

Uhhhh. "Ummm. Right. "

"You weren't listening were you Grandma?"

"No sweetie I wasn't. Sorry."

A pause. Then I asked, "I should have said what?"

"What."

Another pause. Then peals of laughter from the back seat.

She thinks she is funny but it is easy to fool me.

Dammity.

Hunger Games

"I'm starving!!!!"

This is the kid's current method of informing me she might condescend to eat something, if it tasty enough. She yells it anytime she feels a twinge of hunger. How do I know they are twinges? She never finishes anything. Cheeky zeeba.

iPhone

Jim, Kelly & I were all working on our iPhones the other night. I was showing them something in the settings. The kid leaps off the sectional in the midst of this and says, "Guys! I don't even have an iPhone yet!"

Yet? Uhoh.

Strength

The kid informed us, "Once I get muscles in my legs, I am going to lift the fridge."

You go, girl.

Smiley Face

While putting ketchup on her ground beef, the kid said, " Hey look! I made a smiley face!"

Then she turned the bowl a quarter turn, stared at it, and pronounced, "Well that's kinda creepy."

Of Fog ...

The last morning of 2012, we were driving to an appointment. There was fog in the air, giving a haze to the world outside our windows. The kid was sitting quietly in the back, looking out the window. Suddenly she chirped up, "Hey Grandma?"

"Yes sweetness?"

"This is one foggy Christmas Eve!"

"Well it certain is like it, isn't it!"

Mirror Mirror

The kid walked out of the bathroom, walked up to me and informed me, "Grandma my eyes are very very beautiful!"

I think she just noticed.

Christmas Lights

The kid thinks some people go too far with their outdoor lights. We were driving past one garishly overdone home, and from the backseat she chirps up, "That's a shocker."

When asked, she explained, "Someone is going to get a shock."

Heh.

The Night Before The Night Before Christmas

At the winter carnival, the kid received a book titled "The Night Before The Night Before Christmas". She likes this book. She keeps it in the car to read while we drive places. The other day, she informed me she was reading "The Night Before Christmas".

I gently corrected her. "It's "The Night Before The Night Befire Christmas" honey."

"No Gramma. It is "The Night Before Christmas"."

This debate continued a few times until she stopped, looked at me like I was nuts, and asked in exasperation, "WHY do you keep saying that?"

Discretion is the better part of valour. There is no way to convince someone who only reads pictures that you are right about the title. I surrendered.

Now I am going to buy her "The Night Before Christmas" just to mess with her head.

Pulling Hair

Driving home from daycare. Coming around a corner, the kid announces, "I am pulling my hair up."

"You are WHAT??"

"I am pulling my hair up," and she shows me what she means. She meets my gaze in the rearview mirror ... And wiggles her eyebrows.

Excuse Me ...

The kid is standing at the window at daycare with her teacher. She is watching it blizzard. The teacher is talking when suddenly, my kid, with hands on her hips says, "Really? You need to stop now. This is enough. Just stop. "

Teacher, taken aback, asks the kid what she said. Kid turns around, hands still on hips, and says, "I am telling the snow to stop already. "

That is MY kid!

Sailing

The kid made a paper boat at daycare today, complete with her name on the hull. As I am putting it into her backpack she asks, "Can I take that in the tub?"

"Um, no. I don't think so."

"Why not?"

"It is made out of paper. It will fall apart. It needs to be made of something that won't sink."

"Of course! I forgot it has to be made of metal!"

Riding Dog Adventure

The kid comes to the end of the hall.

She hails me to get my attention.

"Guess where my riding dog is going?"

I looked. I laughed. "I don't know honey, but I know it is riding a zebra to get there."

"It's going to South America."

Who taught her about South America? Why South America? I think my head is about to explode.

"Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah ....."

My kid, making sounds as we drive down rutted snow-covered side streets. This is endlessly amusing to her, as she verbally vibrates her way home.

Debate

Yesterday morning, the kid informs me I need to make pancakes for her. This is the debate that followed.

"You need to make me some pancakes, please."

"What am I, the pancake maker?"

"Yes."

"What if I want to be the pancake eater?"

"I'm the pancake eater."

"But I want to be the pancake eater."

"You can't be."

"Why not?"

"You are the pancake maker. You need to make the pancakes now."

I cannot argue with that logic. I lose every time.

Albert and Mary are the parents of my good friend Jim, and have been married for well over thirty years. Amadea loves both of them very much, and enjoys spending time with them. She often sees Albert at the hockey games she and Jim attend. Mary, she sees less often. (The funny thing is, she thinks of Albert and Mary's home as Mary's house.)

Jim's dad, in his seventies, shaves his head, and has false teeth. The other evening at the hockey game, Amadea informed Jim of the following :

Jim, when Albert goes over to Mary's house, he has no hair and no teeth.

Fog?

When we stepped outside this morning, we were greeted by fog. The kid looks at it and asks, "Is this rain?"
"No sweetness."
"Is it snow?"
"Nope. It's fog."
"Fog?"
"Yeppers."
"Well ... do we like fog?"
LOL!

Bowser

After washing her hair and scrubbing her down, my kid asked me to please bring her Bowser toy for her to play with in the tub. I was willing but it was not where she said it was. I came back into the bathroom and told her it was actually not on the table.

Her reply? "Well I think you need to look harder, Gramma."